Reflections On My Journey To Oneness ~ Oneness Is My Birthright

7. Oneness Is My Birthright

In the consciousness of oneness I know that I am loveable and loving. Since I can’t imagine an infant coming into the world disconnected from that knowledge and believing that he or she was inadequate, unlovable, unattractive, unimportant or stupid, I must assume that I came to believe those things after I was born. Although I cannot know for sure how that happened I have some pretty good ideas.

Like all infants, I imagine crying when I was afraid, uncomfortable, and needing some nurturing. I imagine my natural curiosity lead to exploring everything I could get my hands on, including my body. I imagine that when I did many natural and innocent things and adults got angry, made derisive comments, or just became cold and withdrew their love, the message was clear – my behavior was wrong and the cause of their upset.

(This is not an indictment of my parents. They, like most parents did what they thought was best for me. Their intent was certainly not done with the thought in mind, “I really want to screw up this kid.” Given their beliefs and fears they, like all of us, were always doing the best they could.)

As a child, I had no way of knowing that in another home, or in another culture or era, my behavior might not have been judged as wrong. So in my naiveté I developed an inner critic that was built on the belief that when others were upset with something I had done, that meant I was wrong and responsible for their upset.

To escape carrying these beliefs into adulthood I would have had to either experience people taking responsibility for their feelings, or those that possessed the wisdom to not take personally, the critical judgments of others.

For the former to occur, people would have had to reacted to being upset by taking responsibility for their feelings. They would have been curious, and this contemplative attitude would have been reflected in questions like: “I wonder why I’m getting so upset?”; “What are the fears and beliefs of mine that are getting touched off right now?”; or “I wonder what there is to learn from this upset?” I never remember anything like that happening? Do you?

To not take personally another person’s judgment I would have looked up into the eyes of a person who was upset and thought, “It’s not that I’m unlovable, it’s that you’re having trouble loving me right now.” That was always the truth, but since a child cannot be expected to know that, I learned to take things personally. Can you relate to that?

Once I believed that I was responsible for another person’s upsets, it follows that when I was upset, other people were responsible and wrong. Blaming others for my feelings became my favorite pastime as I would self-righteously say or think, “You make me sick.” or “You’re really upsetting me.”

Realizing how I developed false beliefs has helped reprogram my childhood beliefs into oneness beliefs. When I’m in the consciousness of oneness:

• I know that when other people are being unloving toward me it’s not a statement about me it’s a statement about them.
• I know that they have lost their heart connection and are not coming from a place of oneness.
• Although I am not responsible for the well-being and feelings of others, I am compassionate when they have lost their way.
• I remember that I am loveable and loving.

What would it take for you to know and hold on to these oneness truths?

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